tacoma

Murray Morgan should be proud

I’ve now been to The Red Hot on 6th Ave a few times and it has been a treat each time. In order of appearance, I devoured a Murray Morgan Bridge Brat, a Destiny City Slaw Dog, and then another Murray Morgan Bridge Brat. Aside from having the best name of any brat I’ve encountered, it is the perfect snack when you’re on the go. I add cream cheese to my brat to complement the existing sauerkraut and mustard. The slaw dog was perfect as is. For 3 or 4 dollars you can’t beat it. They have a dozen or so different choices to suit a variety of tastes.

After many years, someone has finally done it. I’d always wondered why nobody had launched a Starbuck’s/McDonald’s calibre dog chain in the US, and I used to dream about opening a double drive-thru dog stand in Tacoma. I wanted to call mine Schwank’s and it was going to be awesome. The Red Hot has taken everything I had envisioned, moved it to a swank sit-down bar atmosphere, and added a bunch of beer. Brilliant.

THE RED HOT
2914 6th Ave
Tacoma, WA
(253) 779-0229

Tacoma gas explosion

Every time I leave Tacoma, something important goes down. This time it is a huge propane explosion at Atlas in the Nalley Valley. If anyone has pictures of the explosion, this Tacoma guy would like to see them. I just can’t picture a 1000 foot flame on my own. Pictures would be very interesting, if any of you happened to be photo-ready at the time. If not, any firsthand accounts would be appreciated. We are 3 time zones away and wondering what on earth happened? Propane explosions don’t happen often in Tacoma, although something about it seems fitting. Please send any info ASAP. Thanks.

Small business. Really small.

Dearest Tacoma consumers,

I used to think small business owners were motivated by the need for creative freedom in their professions, the desire for independence, or the frustrations with management working for other companies…

The older I get, the more I become certain that most small business entrepreneurs in Tacoma are under-educated, lazy, and too incompetent to hold post at any decent jobs working for someone else. I’ve established a translation key that might help you understand these people better. On the left, you’ll find the word people might think of when describing a small business entrepreneur near them. On the right, my translation, stating what’s often at work instead. Ready? Okay.

Creative ———-> Odd
Independent ———-> Not accountable to anyone for anything
Risk taker ———-> Lacking other sound options
Driven to succeed ———-> In need of a paycheck
Good Business Person ———-> Manages to stay self-employed
Different ———-> Kinda fucked up

Now that you’ve seen the wizard behind the curtain, let’s go for an example. Nick -N- Willy’s Pizza in the Proctor District was full of incompetency, top to bottom. How did they get a franchise up and running without any training on how to make pizzas, how to use the cash register, or how to deal with customers? It’s people like this that bring down the low success rate for small businesses in this region.

When done right, small business can be terrific. But there’s NO FREE LUNCH.

Nick -n- Willy’s Pizza

NICK -N- WILLY’S PIZZA
2602 North Proctor
Tacoma, WA
(253) 444-3060

The anticipation was killing me. The time was finally here to make my inaugural voyage to Nick -N- Willy’s Pizza. In all ways, I was ready.Too bad Nick -N- Willy’s was not. I won’t get into the details at this time, as this was merely their 3rd day in bidness. Everything that could go wrong went wrong tonight.

I will return in the not-so-distant future for a mulligan visit. The gloves will be off, and I will check my politically correct at the door. I’m expecting perfect next time. Anything less would be uncivilized.

Now open at the corner of 26th & Proctor, Nick-n-Willy’s offers take & bake AND cooked pizzas, salads, and dessert items. Notable pizza ingredients: Pesto w/ pine nuts sauce, feta, seasoned beef, fresh spinach, mandarin oranges, fresh chopped cilantro, smoked bacon andmany others. Family size signature pizzas go for $16.99 and personal pizzas are $5.99. Please give it a try and let me know how it goes.

Dowatchalike?

Clear Channel owed Tacoma $25,519,088.11
Clear Channel can now do whatever they want in my book. They should take their time, drag their feet, play grabass, etc. Why not, Tacoma? The more retarded they are in responding to the new rules, the more their bill goes up. As long as somebody holds them to paying the bill, I say they may just be one of 2007’s MVP’s in the area of charitable donations to the City of Tacoma. They should change their logo to resemble Santa Claus if this continues. I never thought they would have been so generous. What a wonderful company!