HI, YOU’VE REACHED THE NEWLY CONJOINED SEARCH MONSTER OF MICROSOFT AND YAHOO, FEATURING AMAZING DAILY PHOTOGRAPHY, AND A VARIETY OF EDUCATIONAL CONTENT TO COMPLEMENT OUR TRADITIONAL WEB SEARCH FUNCTION. WE WILL WORK FROM A COUPLE DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVES, AND MAYBE EVEN PROVIDE SEARCH RESULTS THAT CHANGE REGULARLY AFTER INTERACTING WITH USERS TO FIND OUT WHAT THEY ACTUALLY GIVE A SHIT ABOUT IN SEARCH RESULT PAGES! PLEASE LEAVE YOUR MESSAGE AFTER THE TONE……… BING!!!
“Hey, Google here… We’re not happy about this at all. It looks like we should have focused on improving our look, our search algorithm and our online advertising program a long time ago. At the very least, we could have taken a few more bong hits, watched Star Wars a few more times and just bought Yahoo ourselves. Unfortunately, we’ve been super busy with our head up our ass creating a million new things for which many people could certainly care less. What do we do now?? Photos are cool, right? Hey, have you seen the truly lame ground photos we’ve taken of practically every street in the world? That’s almost cool, right?”